Roses

About a week ago I had a dream that I didn’t quite understand. My dad hired someone to remodel my house and the man had made it HUGE! I walked through with great appreciation for the craftsmanship and good work, down a big flight of stairs into a spacious basement and out the back door into the back yard. Look up at the house I marveled at how beautiful and BIG it was, and again what a good job the  man had done….until I looked down.

Looking down I saw that all of the flowers were …… GONE. (The landscaping around my house isn’t anything spectacular, but I have done all of it myself, taking extra long to accommodate the pain in my feet.) The plants had been cut down to the ground and there was nothing but rock and mulch. The anger I felt rose so hard and fast that I burst into tears and ran inside to find Katrina. Dragging her outside I showed her what the man had done. Just then I noticed him leaning outside one of the windows nailing beautiful shutters to the outside of the house and knew he was aware of us and could hear me.

Tears were flowing freely down my face as I furiously pointed to the bare ground and roared, “He has NO IDEA! No idea about all of the Time, Money, Emotion and PAIN that was in those roses!” and I said it again, “He has no idea about all of the Time, Money, Emotion and Pain that was in those roses!” The man stopped for a moment, looked at me, and went back to his work.

That was it, but I woke with a climatic feeling of dread. Yesterday I was in the prayer room during one of Misty’s set’s and was STRUCK to the core as she sang an old chorus

I’m no longer my own, I’m Your Garden.

I am no longer my own, and my garden is not mine to do with. As I listened to her sing and was suddenly reminded of that dream I couldn’t help but think that if the Garden is His than He get’s to do whatever He wants with it, and that means that He can both plant, and uproot whatever He wants. I don’t have a choice about it, and my emotions towards it do not affect Him one way or the other because it’s His garden. He get’s to do with me whatever He wants, and sometimes that may not at all be what I think that I want. It’s quite possible that I have labored and toiled, with Time, Money, Emotion and real Pain over things that He does not want there, and if that is the case, then He will take them out.

All I could think was, “It’s a good thing that I love You Jesus. It’s a good thing that I trust You.”

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